The Symptoms Of Deeper Realities

My dad used to tell a story of how he got pulled over one time for speeding by a state police officer. He was in with a large group of cars who were ALL going quite fast on the highway, but my dad got pulled over. When he engaged the trooper and suggested that he was not the only car going that speed, the trooper asked, “Do you fish?” My dad said, “Yes.” The trooper said, “And do you catch all the fish when you go fishing?” My dad said, “No…” The trooper said, “Neither do I…have a nice day,” as he handed my dad a ticket!

There’s a lot in this world that is not fair!

In our first reading from Ezekiel 18, God says (and I paraphrase for brevity) that if a wicked person turns their life around and lives righteously, their past transgressions are forgotten. And if a righteous person turns to evil ways, their past good deeds don’t count for anything. 

God then says, “Of course you’re going to say that my ways are not fair…”

I must confess, God’s ways do not seem “fair” (as I’d define it) in the first reading, but I understand the point. God is interested in people turning their lives around and realigning with The Way. What is more, God is not very interested in people giving up on The Way and heading in the other direction!

God is turning the idea of fairness on its head in ways that are hard to understand.

Jesus comes along and does the same in the gospel reading from Matthew 5. We hear the beginning of a series of “You have heard it said…but I say…” statements from Jesus.

Today he says, “You have heard that it was said to your ancestors, You shall not kill; and whoever kills will be liable to judgment. But I say to you, whoever is angry with another will be liable to judgment.”

Jesus is initiating a series of teachings that turn traditional understandings upside down and is inviting his listeners to not only set a higher bar for righteousness but to see killing as a symptom of a much deeper emotional reality. 

For me it is ever-important to clarify after a passage like this that Jesus is NOT saying that you should never get angry. Anger is a natural, human emotion that emerges when we have boundary violation of some kind. I can’t imagine he’d ever say “you should never get angry” – especially in the face of harm, injustice, poor treatment, disrespect. In fact, I think Jesus would agree with the sentiment of the great poet-warrior Audre Lorde (in her famous essay, The Uses of Anger) when she says, “Anger is an appropriate reaction to racist attitudes, as is fury when the actions arising from those attitudes do not change.” 

Jesus was not a pushover (and neither was Audre Lorde)!

What I think Jesus is saying is related more to the holding on to anger because right after his initial teaching about anger he goes on to speak about what happens when we don’t deal with it. He says, “Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there recall that someone has anything against you, leave your gift there at the altar, go first and be reconciled with that person, and then come and offer your gift.”

Jesus knows that if we consistently deny or neglect our anger, it goes underground and can take on different forms like resentment, depression, hatred and rage. These deeper realities have the power to poison relationships and tear apart communities. I’m guessing Jesus also knew that not-dealing with strong emotions also harms our bodies.

I have always liked the work of Louise Hay. Louise is a well known author of many self-help books and has been a trusted resource for a lot of people in recovery circles.  Hay wrote a groundbreaking book in the 1980’s called You Can Heal Your Life. In that book (and subsequent ones) she acknowledged that anger is a signal and even a motivator but also said that anger – as an energy – is actually harmful to our cellular structure and is a root cause for many illnesses.

Hay, not unlike Jesus thousands of years before her, spoke about the link between anger that remains in the body and autoimmune responses and inflammation in the body. She said, “I’ve learned that there are really two mental patterns that contribute to dis-ease: fear and anger. Anger can show up as impatience, irritation, frustration, criticism, resentment, jealousy, or bitterness. These are all thoughts that poison the body. When we release this burden, all the organs in our body begin to function properly.”

Hay also saw anger not just as a reaction, but a choice and went on to say, “When you choose to be angry you are affirming that you want greater anger in your life.”

For me, today’s readings point to the fact that “spiritual work” cannot bypass emotional and body work. We are embodied beings and, as such, must address all that comes with it – for better and for worse.

Especially with anger, so many of us had very few models of what healthy expressions of and release of anger looked like. We were taught to repress, suppress or deny. Or maybe anger was only expressed as aggression and violence and we learned to just deny it.

Furthermore we live within oppressive structures that generate tremendous amounts of anger and rage for women, people of color, people with disabilities, members of the LGBTQ+ community, etc. Not to mention that we’re now living in times that give us 20 more reasons to get angry every day! All that anger must be dealt with.

One blog post can’t address the fullness of this topic, but my hope is that it opens up an inner and outer conversation for us on “the uses of anger” and the need for its expression and metabolization. One way to work with anger is to bring it to prayer. Talk to God about it, and see what the response is.

Failure to do so imperils our bodies, minds, hearts and spirits.

Note: As I counselor, I know that seeking professional help has been quite useful for many people to acknowledge, unpack and address their anger. Self-help groups and other forms of support (books, videos, friends) are also useful. Louise Hay has some videos related to “anger releasing” that you can check out here if you are interested.