The late Zen teacher Charlotte Joko Beck reportedly said, ‘Joy is whatever is happening, minus our opinion of it.‘ It’s a quote I struggle with and want to resist, and yet it presents me with something that feels very true to me.
In our world these days, we have opinions about everyone and just about everything. Opinions are, in fact, judgements about situations, people or ideas. Some brain research I have seen estimates that we have anywhere between six-thousand and tens of thousands of thoughts each day and that a lot of us keep thinking the same thoughts, opinions and judgements over and over (and that a majority of our thoughts are negative in nature).
What is also true is that many people do not even examine the content of their thinking patterns and realize that this is going on. So it just keeps happening.
In the gospel from Luke 6, we get a pithy passage that lays out some simple (but not easy) words that I will quote in their entirety here for us to just read slowly and deliberately:
Be merciful, just as your God is merciful. Stop judging and you will not be judged. Stop condemning and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven. Give and gifts will be given to you; a good measure, packed together, shaken down, and overflowing, will be poured into your lap. For the measure with which you measure will in return be measured out to you.
If we were together in a bible study, I’d go around right now and ask each person, “What jumps out for you from this passage?”
Jesus, like Buddha and so many other great spiritual teachers, were students of the mind and heart. They knew that at the core of so much suffering in life is the judging mind. It is the mind that is constantly assessing the world and putting it into binary categories: like/dislike, good/bad, friend/enemy, etc. And so when Jesus tells us to stop judging and condemning, he’s not saying God will do these to us. He is talking about the suffering that happens when we let our judging mind take over our lives.
And for many of us, it runs the show every day!
I don’t know about you, but I am forming opinions and judgements about things ALL THE TIME. As I’m writing this, I see snow outside. I think, “I’m tired of the cold. I wish it would warm up.” I look up from writing and see a neighbor walking by who seems to regularly avoid me. I wonder, “Is she upset with me about something?” No sooner is that thought gone that I notice that I am out of coffee and sigh that I will need to get up from my cozy couch and go and get more…so that I can refuel my energy for more judgements!
What Jesus is offering us today is wisdom that feels resonant with a quote that is attributed to Viktor Frankl, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
The first step is noticing the pattern. The second step is choosing a different response. The goal is growth and freedom.
I know that for many people, Buddhism has been a useful path to help us notice our thought patterns and quiet the mind. For others it is mindfulness practices or contemplative prayer. Whatever road gets us there may not matter as much as the commitment to keep practicing and arriving at a place where we learn to do what Jesus is teaching. And I am not sure that we ever “get there” so much as having to keep returning there!
Notice that Jesus offers his followers two negative commands but three positive ones: Stop judging and condemning. Forgive and give. Be mercy to others.
This could be a powerful mantra for us to keep repeating over and over. And if the word “stop” feels a little harsh, put in the word “release” so that it reads: Release your judging and condeming. Forgive and give. Be mercy to others.
In the first reading from Daniel 9 today, Daniel has a vision that bad things are coming for Israel and so he prays in earnest to God. He admits that “we have sinned, been wicked and done evil; we have rebelled and…have not obeyed your servants the prophets.” He also names that God’s ways are about “compassion and forgiveness” and prays that these may prevail.
Offering people mercy, compassion and forgiveness is what God is all about, and I am sure that this is the God Jesus encountered in his life (and it is the energy he embodied in his life).
He invites us into this same energy. To notice our judgements and condemnations (of ourselves, others and this world) and, instead, to forgive, give and embody mercy in the world.
Thomas Merton once said, “Our job is to love others without stopping to inquire whether or not they are worthy. That is not our business and, in fact, it is nobody’s business. What we are asked to do is to love, and this love itself will render both ourselves and our neighbors worthy.”
May this become one of our Lenten practices, and may compassion and forgiveness prevail in our world.
7 Comments
George Dardess
Thank you. Mike.
Yes, my mind and yours and everyone else’s tumbles constantly from one judgment to another. The resulting chaos is or seems to be our lot, both what we suffer from and what we produce. Trump’s bombing on Iran— a chaotic mind, his own, projects chaos on another country and on the world, and we all are like leaves caught up in the storm. It’s easy, too easy, to forget we all have agency here. We are all capable of finding within ourselves the capacity to breathe deeply and say to that frantic side of ourselves, “The path is clear, and the going is easy. Love God, your neighbor, and (in Hebrew) the “ger,” the sojourner, the one who has no claim on you except that he is like you, a human being. It’s what the “still small voice is saying,” always has, always will, even in the midst of the frenzy of Tweets, Truths, X’s, what have you.
KATHRYN FRANZ
Thanks for this daily meditation. With all the cruelty and corruption in this world, how to sustain and maintain a loving mind? The stillness and silence of compassion and forgiveness must be the way. I am grateful for these daily meditations.
Here is a poem shared by a friend that speaks to that stillness and silence.
StillWinter, Listening
The cold has not loosened its hands yet. Morning still bites. The ground is sealed, and nothing green is brave enough to show itself.
But listen— beneath the ice, something thins. Not warmth exactly, more like a remembering of how to rise.
This is the season of sap, when the trees do not bloom but decide. They choose to send sweetness upward through frozen dark, trusting it will arrive.
So if you feel unchanged, still wrapped in heaviness, still waiting— know this: movement does not always look like motion.
Three nights before the moon fills, the work is quiet. The work is internal. The work is enough.
Stay. Breathe. Let what is stirring take its time.
Angela White
Hi Mike,
I’m responding to your recent blog on love. It sounds simple when we hear that we should love thy neighbor & ourselves, but so many thoughts get in the way like judging others & forming opinions! I believe it’s a habit that we get ourselves into & it’s really hard to break! I’ve tried working on it, but those thoughts are pretty persistent!
I’d like to thank you so much for these great blogs! It brings to light what’s important to concentrate on & work on to follow Jesus’s teachings! Maybe just being more aware of it, will help me to take better action.
Thank you for writing these blogs especially during the Lenten season. It’s a good time to reflect & do something positive!
Best,
Angela
Sue Staropoli
Thanks again, Mike, for your message that resonates with the invitation I’ve been receiving from the monks on their walk of peace. Slow down, stay mindful, pause when noticing judgment, and instead send loving kindness. And as you’ve said, this happens over and over every day!
Corinne
Thank you for the encouragement to look at all human beings as well as myself with eyes of love. This is very hard to do but if when we are mindful of our thought patterns- we can catch all the persistent negative and critical thoughts as they come up. Asking God for guidance sure helps too. Mike, I’ve appreciated all your lenten blogs this season as well as the ones from guest writers. Thank you!
Sally Partner
Thank you for this reflection today. This Lent I have been trying to incorporate a practice that I read about wherein every time you think a judgmental thought about someone you say a quick prayer for them and for yourself. A primary benefit of this practice so far is to make me much more conscious of how often I think judgmental thoughts–which I think is the first step to decreasing them.
A late mentor of mine, one of the kindest people I have ever known, used to say, “We are all such lovely messes.” I think of that phrase often.
Sue Staropoli
Thanks again, Mike, for your message that resonates with the invitation I’ve been receiving from the monks on their walk of peace. Slow down, stay mindful, pause when noticing judgment, and instead send loving kindness. And as you’ve said, this happens over and over every day!