SHowing Up for Each Other

SHowing Up for Each Other

February 25

Readings – Est C:12, 14-16, 23-25; Mt 7:7-12

The story of Esther that we read today is a deep and nuanced narrative.   Esther is a Jew who has been exiled to live in the Persian Empire.  She eventually becomes queen, yet all the while having this hidden identity.  When we meet her today, she is at one of the lowest points of her life and cries out to God for help.

In the gospel, Jesus tells his followers to “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you…”  It likely comes from a section of Matthew’s gospel that collected a bunch of things that Jesus said or was known for.

I think about this passage often because, quite frequently, it represents some pain and confusion for people.  We asked God for things, and they didn’t happen.  We sought something, and God seemed absent.  We knocked and no one answered.

I have been thinking about this passage, however, from another perspective.  What if this isn’t about God so much as it is about authentic human community.

Mia Birdsong wrote a fantastic book called How We Show Up: Reclaiming Family, Friendship, and Community.  I recently heard her interviewed in a podcast and it really caught my attention.  In the podcast she talks about how we, as a culture are so averse to asking for what we need.  We try super hard to be autonomous and to not be a burden.  We don’t often ask for what we need because we’ve been told not to, shamed for having needs or are told that “having needs” is a weakness.

But she says that true community and intimacy are formed when we ask for what we need and have others who respond to our needs.  Providing and receiving support is what we are hard-wired for. Being there for each other in mutual ways is what we were made for.

Now this doesn’t mean that every need we have will be fully satisfied and everything we want will somehow appear.  People let us down and fail to show up.  But I do think that Jesus is giving us some instruction about what true community can look like. People ask for and get what they need. People seek and find what they’re looking for. People knock and are let in.

Maybe this passage is not about asking God for things but asking for what we need from each other and not ignoring those asks. We have seen this especially clearly in this past year when we stopped looking to “systems” to take care of people (because they weren’t designed to) and started to take care of each other.

For today, maybe we can ask someone for something that we need and maybe we can do the same for someone else. And maybe we can show up for one another in ways that offer kindness and ease of the burdens we all carry.

11 Comments

      Mike Boucher Author

      great questions, Claire. the confusion comes from the catholics using a different version of the bible (it is called chapter “c” actually) and i think appears in the midst of chapter 4 of the book of esther. this difference goes back to which translations were considered most valid or authentic.

    Lisa c Kraft

    Thanks Mike, I’m at a point in my life where my needs are screaming out and your discussion helped me realize that having needs is okay, almost necessary.

    Lisa Kraft

      Mike Boucher Author

      thanks for saying what you did, Lisa. Not sure how we live life without needs and relying on others – yet we’re often taught to believe just the opposite.

    Francene C McCarthy

    Danielle spoke last night in the beginning of her homily about “mourning the loss of humanity”.;I too have felt this way and when I connect it with asking what we need from others and giving in return I can see how the humanity we’ve lost could be retrieved. It’s the “good news” stories which portray this. The love of Jesus within us can reach the needs of others. Thank you for your reflection and the connection it made for me. Fran

      Mike Boucher Author

      I would encourage everyone to listen to Danielle’s message! Thanks, Francene for making these connections between what she said and giving people what they need.

    Barb Simmons

    I think the last paragraph of your reflection nails it. As one humanity we are interdependent on each other and charged with helping one another. At different times in our life we will be able to give and at other times we will need to take. I believe that is the lesson we are to glean from Christian scriptures and other faith practices.

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